I love playing this game. This very little game of "I don't answer your questions". Not because I don't think they're interesting but rather because I always wonder if you actually care about the answer. So many times, just not answering straight away made the other think about something else, something more important, something about them, not me.

I don't blame anyone, we all love ourselves more than the other and after all the energy I dedicated to trying to love the other more than me, I concluded that you simple cannot. I did not expect this but I suffered from not being asked this questions. I suffered from not being understood by the one person that should know me the most. I could remain silent and take the blame because I wasn't expressive enough. If only you knew the amount of things that crossed my mind. If only you knew...

Asking is not about discovering an answer, it is about listening to a thought, often not a beautiful one. Of course you are thinking about terrible things, of course you suffer from it and of course I care. Today I realize how few the people that care about what shape my pain has, are. If I don't want to answer, I simply say it. I usually avoid the question because I don't feel like opening if you forget that you wanted the answer thirty seconds sooner.

Could you describe what I feel ? What I've been through? Could you tell me about myself? There is in this world, from what I am aware of, only one person capable of such things. Being genuinely interested in the person you're facing is a skill. Watch closely the next time someone asks you a question, and try to answer: "why does he/she ask this question?". You often realize that a simple "I don't really know and you ?" is a good enough answer for most of the people. I do not intend to be one of those.

I know I can seem extreme sometimes. I know my opinion on the persons I meet is often extreme as well. I am seeking the ones that are not ashamed of their weakness. I am seeking the ones that are proudly missing something. I am seeking the one that assume fully what they feel and what they think. I love every single of those traits.

I have never refused any questions and will never do. This is the most precious thing someone can offer me.